Faith over Fear

We all have those quiet, desperate moments where everything just falls apart. Where we feel the fear of uncertainty and intense doubt.

What if?

We might ask ourselves this question when we feel consumed by our fear. We are hungry for answers and when there is blank space, sometimes we feel that it must mean bad. That because we cannot see our life perfectly laid out right now, then something must be wrong. What if I've failed? What if this isn't working?

We somehow forget that just because we cannot see the thing we desire in front of our eyes in this moment, it doesn't mean it wont happen. Sometimes there are lessons to be learned and a journey to be had before we reach those milestones. Because usually its about what we learn in between the milestones that makes us who we are.

Stronger.
Wiser.

So in those desperate moments we can learn to surrender. To be ourselves. To love our sadness and anger and failure just the same as we love our joy and successes.

"The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it."
- Brene Brown

We find our courage and strength through those dark moments of uncertainty when we choose to surrender. Because sometimes the truth comes up when we let go. When we take a step into our light through embracing the darkness. When we embrace every fucking feeling and love it.

Make love to it actually.

Faith is being in fear and doubt and knowing that there is always a way. And we don't need to be superheroes to find it.

Actually we can fall apart. We can breakdown. We can quit. We can change our minds. We can start again. We can go out and try and succeed or fail and it doesn't diminish our worth. It actually further emphasizes how unconditionally worthy we are. We can own every part, come together in those desperate moments and know that it is in being human that we find ourselves.

On Being A Mess and Loving It All

There are times to take action, and times to rest.
There is a time to be with people, and time to be alone. Time to share the bed and time to have it to ourselves.
There is a time to travel and time to be exactly where we are with exactly how we feel.

And amidst all of these waves we find our lives, sometimes totally in synch and in balance and sometimes a total mess. One of the best realizations I've had is that there's really no difference between the two.

True balance is found within ourselves. It is trusting ourselves through the chaos and mess. It is embracing and loving it all, especially when we are falling apart.

There are times to laugh and times to cry. There is a time to move and a time to be still, to listen to the voice within and stop everything that's happening around us.

Even if just for a moment.

So perhaps balance is really a perspective. Maybe where we really find balance is through being exactly where we are and loving it. Loving it so much that no matter what we are experiencing, there is love. Through both the dark moments and the ones filled with radiating light.

"The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it. It's our fear of the dark that casts our joy into the shadows."- Brené Brown

Because it is in the darkness we find light, in the chaos we find clarity and in the pain that we find love. And it is in being human that we find ourselves- enough and whole as we are right now.

Sometimes we expect ourselves to have it together all the time. Well, what if we don't? What if we experience the journey and celebrate the clarity we find, but also celebrate those terrifying uncertain moments where we just don't fucking know.

We don't need to figure it all out in that moment or pretend to be some superhero. For that moment, we embrace the mess and really love it.

Because "this too, shall pass."

Facing Fear to Grow Stronger

Recently, I just had one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I went Skydiving.

Yes, Skydiving! 

This is something I've been wanting to do for years and what meant far more than a check mark on a bucket list to me. It was about confronting and overcoming my fear, expanding my perception and allowing myself to experience life fully.

I feel that we are given this life to live it to the fullest. The purpose of our goals is serve our greatness- to provide focus and direction in our becoming our strongest selves. The goals we have that allow us to tackle our fears have, for me, been the most fulfilling, eye-opening and exhilarating ones. Every fear I've faced including Skydiving and so many more, have made me a stronger, more authentic and present being.

It's the act of facing fear that makes us fearless.

Take a moment to think about what you fear. Is it traveling? Being alone? Being vulnerable? Heights? Showing your true self? Letting yourself be happy and free from the opinions of others? Imperfection? Fear of failure? Letting go? You name it.

We all feel fear and fear will always play a part in our lives. What I've realized, however, is that it's not about trying to get rid of fear. It's about moving with it and riding the waves, feeling the fear and doing what we want anyway. We do this by literally becoming aware of where fear plays a part in our lives and taking the steps to do the thing we fear.

Without stepping outside of my comfort zone, not only do I not feel that my sense of aliveness and expansion is diminished, but I wouldn't be writing this post.

Time and time again I realize this:

It is our experiences that allow us to grow into our greatest selves and cultivate our gifts so that we can share them with others.

Yes, facing fear requires awareness and courage, but it is always worth it. We realize how powerful we truly are, and most important, that our stories, assumptions and "what if's" do not need to define our decisions and actions.

We feel the fear, and we do what we want anyway.

Of course it's important to prepare and weigh out the pros and cons of a decision, but let's not hesitate too long. Because life waits for us in its abundance each day. Let's not hesitate too long, because there are places to go, people to meet, love to give and receive and experiences to be had. There are failures and successes to be made, ups and downs and everything in between.

And in all of this, there is life. There is the beautiful, imperfect experience of life to be a part of when we face our fear to become all that we are capable of being.

I want to leave you with an inspiring quote I read the other day by Erin Hanson that really put things into perspective for me. It goes like this,

"What If I fail?"

"Oh but my darling, what if you fly?"

Get Naked.

Take off your clothes.
All of them.
Allow yourself to cry.
Let go.
Be wierd.
Silly.
Vulnerable.

Getting naked means so many things to me. There's getting naked in our body and there's also getting naked with our soul, our heart.

When we choose to get naked, we choose to open up to our truth, to feel fully and embrace each experience wholeheartedly. 

We choose to be full a full expression of who we really are. To show up and allow ourselves to be seen.

I write and talk a lot about embracing our true selves emotionally, allowing ourselves to feel and listening to our heart.

Feeling is also in the body. Our emotion is not only felt in our heart, but throughout our whole body. 

Our body is the real vehicle we use to move through our lives. And I have found that a huge part of becoming comfortable in it is through practicing self care and self love, and learning to see our beauty.

We are here to celebrate our bodies, to celebrate every curve and inch of skin.

We are here to come alive- through self care and the way we treat ourselves and through the intimacy we share and express with others.

When we become comfortable in our own skin, when we do the things that feel good- we move past judgement and embrace imperfection. We are naturally so much more comfortable and expressive with others when we love ourselves. Unconditionally. In all our raw, naked and imperfect beauty.

When we focus less on the external and more on how we feel inside, in our own skin, we really come alive. One thing that happened when I grew up was that I realized that trying to be perfect, to compare, to self judge and to strive to look a certain way for other people, is completely opposite to what what we do when we stop judging and start listening with self love.

You know what the self love record says? It says that we focus first on feeling good, on embracing our bodies and honoring them- for ourselves first. We let go of self judgement, of the stories that don't serve and then we share our love with the people who celebrate us for who we are.

Blessings,
Julie

The Journey's Made me Stronger

We all have our struggles. I have mine. And you have yours.

Our challenges make us stronger, and in a way we want them. Because if we are not pushed to grow, we're not living.

But here's the thing.

Sometimes it's pretty tough. We wonder, "what is it this time that I need to learn? Because this time I'm challenged in a direction I've never been before. It's uncertain and scary."

Well let me tell you this. There will always be lessons and new experiences as long as we are living and engaged with the world. We get to choose, though, how we handle them.

Are we coming from a place of self love? Are we asking for the support we need? Are we surrendering to what is not within our control and taking charge of what is? Do we believe in ourselves? And better yet, are we surrounding ourselves with people who believe in us?

These are all questions we ask ourselves along the journey. The way we choose to respond to them determines how the journey will feel.

When we come from a place of self love and support, we cultivate insane faith, we realize that we can handle whatever comes our way, and we know that, "this too shall pass."

"Happiness is not a state to arrive at, but a manner of traveling."
-Margaret Lee Runbeck

The journey is the destination.

Are we surrendering to our truth along the way and embracing our vulnerability? And most importantly, are we letting go of who we think we should be to be who we are?

Because when we embrace who we are and stop the judgement, when we lean into love and open ourselves up- yes, even when its hard- we find happiness.

Happiness is not dependent on something we think we need to get later, it really comes from inside and is always present when we stop, listen and allow ourselves to feel. 

Blessings,
Julie

How to Kick Ass During Uncertain Times

This past month has been a great time of uncertainty for me- losing my job challenged me to push my limits in so many different ways. I've always loved the hospitality industry and have learned many a skill working in restaurants and bars all over the city. The work definitely gives me the opportunity to connect with people and network. However, my passion for yoga, meditation, mental health and wellness hasn't been fulfilled in this work. So a month off pushed me to explore other opportunities, research and start a whole new conversation. 

As I've learned in the past few years, asking for help is in fact a sign of strength- this month yet again, showed me that although vulnerability is often messy and uncomfortable, its where our power and truth lies.

Owning out story, sharing it and asking for help is how we grow to be our strongest selves and find connection with each other.

So I asked. Many times. It wasn't always easy, but Ive realized that if we don't express how we feel, we cut off the pathways to the support and nourishment that we need. And we all need it.

Alongside my exploration of work opportunities and interviews with employers, I spent much time running and doing yoga. I started cultivating some pretty radical faith and trust. I realized that I had a choice- I could choose fear and scarcity or I could choose love. Each day I focus on choosing love.

Because when we choose love and when we love ourselves, we practice self care, we are patient and kind to ourselves and the people around us and we know that we will handle whatever comes our way. We have done it before and will do it again. Its time to get creative, open our mind and realize that when one door closes, another always opens.

I learned to really surrender, to feel the power of prayer and to let go of the need to control everything. We persevere and do what we can, but we also remember to rest, play and be kind and gentle to ourselves. 

Balance.

And I practiced loads of gratitude. Because by noticing how many incredible people I have in my life and much more, by raising my awareness to the abundance I have now, I found more opportunity, peace and strength.

Blessings,
Julie

The D Word.

Okay, okay, it's not what you might have thought. But it's better.

In this post at least, D stands for discipline- the toolbox of resources and practices that allow us to be the most focused and strongest version of ourselves.

When we master self care, we master our freedom. Our happiness is not dependent on others or our circumstances. Wherever we are, we use the habits of self care.

"Success is the sum of small efforts repeated day in and day out." 

Regular practices such as yoga, running and meditation have served me greatly. I highly recommend all three! And yes, it takes discipline to do these consistently. Believe me, I don't always feel like going to the gym at first, but always feel better after.

The motivation? To feel good. Being disciplined is about self love and self respect. When we are consistently active, asking for help when we need it, feeding ourselves wholesome meals, engaging in satisfying work, we are telling ourselves that we are worthy of happiness.

Discipline is something we want to do, because we love ourselves and know that we deserve to be happy.

 
There is an abundance of resources available to all of us, we have everything we need and all the answers lie within- it is simply our choice to be open to this abundance.

And are we ever!

Discipline is about talking to ourselves and treating ourselves the way we would talk to someone we love. It's an act of self love really.

Our focus is on showing up and trying. I truly believe that success and greatness has little to do with perfection and more to do with having the courage to show up, be real and do the things that make us feel good. It's the journey where each day we take a step, even when times are uncertain. We let people know where we're at and we ask our friends to hold us accountable for staying on track. These people encourage with love and support our doing what makes us happy.

I've realized that the longer we live, the better we know ourselves. We develop a toolbox of resources- self care practices, we adopt a mindset of abundance, we choose love over scarcity and fear, we focus on gratitude, we learn what we need and we learn to ask for it.

So the word discipline for me is a nourishing one. It's habit, its self-love and it's abundance. It's strength, freedom and focus.  It's sexy and powerful.

Danielle LaPorte is a shining women I look up to- here's what she has to say about discipline. I could not agree more.

"Can discipline feel joyful? Yes!
So how do you know when you’re stifling yourself with structure vs. nurtur-ing, or setting yourself free, with structure? 
You know because it feels good to do it, and it leads to more good feelings."

Blessings,
Julie