The Most Important Honesty: What We Tell Ourselves

The most important person to be honest with is ourselves.

At the end of the day, we have a choice- to live through the truth of what is happening in the here and now, or to not do so.

Living is something we do in the moment, with every breath that we take. And if we can possibly begin to imagine our future expansion as becoming more of who we truly are, we must be true with ourselves now. In this moment.

I have realized that to be honest with ourselves about how we feel is one of the hardest things.

To be able to allow ourselves to acknowledge the truth, be it painful or full of joy is essential- in doing this we must trust, we allow ourselves to surrender, to let go and embrace uncertainty.

So we let go and embrace what is, without judgement. 

For there is no more powerful and real way to be than that which we are. There is no right or wrong, no way things "should" be. Only what is. 

The truth is what is and what we feel, and doesn't always match up to our expectations or the way we think things should be.

Be it a relationship where instead of convincing ourselves that everything is fine, we allow ourselves to see that it really isn't working. I've realized that while optimism is a valuable , we shouldn't use it to cover up the truth. We can force, rationalize and tell ourselves stories- but at the end of the day the truth is what is.

While the truth can be piercingly painful, I have learned that it is only with the truth that we truly feel alive. 

And the only way that we can truly feel. 

And it is with the truth, that we can truly grow and change. 

Blessings,

Julie

True Beauty Comes from Within

Whatever is within us radiates outward. When we embrace our most authentic selves, speak our truth and shine our light- this is true beauty radiating.

Wearing nice clothes and focusing on how we look on the outside will only get us so far- from there, it is up to us to let go of who we think we should be to become who we truly are. To go further and allow our true inner light to radiate to others.

Have you ever walked into a room and gravitated to that person who is not afraid to be themselves? The one who is warm-hearted and everyone seems to like? Well, when we come from a place of self-compassion and kindness, we radiate this warmth.

The power in true beauty is really the most attractive. Instead of looking outside of ourselves for cues on how we should be, we venture within to our authentic selves and embrace our inner being that is waiting to be expressed. Not only is this energy extraordinarily grounded (as it is not dependent on anyone's opinion), but we unconsciously give others the permission to shine their light.

And interestedly, this inward-outward authentic expression naturally attracts people towards us, completely effortlessly. We don't have to try to be beautiful, we simply are because of our courage to embrace our authenticity.

“People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.”

― Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

Shine your light,

Julie

Letting Go of Someone We Love

To let go of someone we love is just about one of the hardest things to do. Believe me, I know.

It's so easy to fall back into the comfort of a relationship without paying attention to all the reasons of why the relationship is toxic and not working. Because even though things didn't work out, there is still emotion.

And love.

Love is messy.

We just sometimes forget that we can learn to love again.

We know that it won't be easy, but we also remind ourselves that any decision made in favor of our happiness is worth it. We remind ourselves of why the relationship didn't work out, and we give ourselves some peace of mind.

I've realized that every experience has meaning, whether it be pleasant or painful. Living with regret because we didn't get what we hoped for out of a relationship would be foolish. Why? Because we always learn. We can learn no matter what. And learning is one of the most powerful things we can experience in life. 

Not every relationship we experience will be what we are looking for, but let's not discredit these ones. For if anything, they strengthen our conviction and make us see what it is that we do want.

I've had to learn to let go. I realized that trying to force a situation to work out when it clearly isn't is a waste of energy and time. Either the relationship works, or it doesn't. And sometimes we just need to be honest with ourselves to let go. We can try to fix, bang on the same door that isn't opening, convince ourselves that it really isn't that bad- but at the end of the day, if we are not happy in a relationship now, we cannot wait for things to change.

Otherwise we may find ourselves waiting forever.

Letting go is scary, it takes courage. Because there are no guarantees in life. But let us remember that uncertainty means possibility. We can trust ourselves, remind ourselves that we are strong, we will heal and that "this too shall pass."

Blessings,

Julie

Learning through Experience

Experience is the greatest teacher.

It shows us what we want in this world.

As well as what we don't want.

And sometimes we have to experience what we don't want to realize what it is that we do want.

Life is a journey. With each experience, each step we take in our lives, we have the opportunity to learn and grow.


 There is a beautiful article I love that talks about life's lessons. It says that we are presented with the same lesson, again and again, until we learn from it. And how true this is I must say.

An excerpt from the article:

There Are No Mistakes, Only Lessons
Growth is a process of trail and error, experimentation. The"failed" experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiment that ultimately "works."

Here is the link to this article: http://heart-2-heart-online.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/here-is-your-assignment.jpg

Experience is what allows us to grow, its what shapes our character. It gives us the stuff to sort through, it is the clay we use to mold our lives with.

And some of this stuff is messy. It's messy as life sometimes is. Sometimes we think we are on the right track to find that we have veered off our path. So with awareness, we change direction, we come back to our path. To what feels right. To who we are.

The more we experience, the more we learn. About others as well as ourselves. With experience comes clarity and understanding.

And oh, how we become stronger and wiser on this journey.

Blessings,

Julie

Asking for Help is Strength, Not Weakness.

Why has asking for help ever been associated with weakness? I have no idea really. We have associated showing our vulnerability, allowing others to see our truth, with weakness. It has taken me a few years to now realize that it is in our vulnerability, in our rawest truth,  that our greatest strength and light lies.

Somehow we have become obsessed with labeling and categorizing things: this is good, this is bad, this is right and this is wrong. This is how I "should" be. Why have we have allowed our judgement to limit instead of serve us? And who is to say what the "right" way to be is?

There is no right way.

There is only our truth, which is meant to be expressed.

So let us simply be who we are. And if we need support, let us ask for it, without hesitation. Without feeling the need to explain ourselves, justify our pain. We don't always need a reason. What is important is only that we are authentic.

Rather than asking ourselves why we feel the way we do, let us simply feel. 

Asking for help takes courage. Believe me, I know. But we can let go of judgement and learn to be kind to ourselves, to love ourselves for who we are and not who others expect us to be.

Blessings,

Julie

Let Out Your Crazy!

We are all wild at heart. 

We are all free spirits with a special light to shine. We are each born with a unique set of gifts that are meant to be nurtured and shared with others.

And sometimes its simply about giving ourselves the permission to let go of who we think we should be to become who we truly are. Its about letting go of judgement and letting ourselves be ourselves.

So let us ride with our instinct and intuition. Even if it appears foolish.

We like to understand everything in our rational mind. We like to make sense of everything.

And while our rational mind is our friend, helping us to intelligently sort out and navigate our lives, could we also be okay with doing things simply because we feel like doing them, without always having a reason?

Of course we can be.

What if we lived each day as if it were our last? What would you do?

Blessings,

Julie

Learning to Love Ourselves First.

Before we can love anyone else wholeheartedly, we must learn to give ourselves the love we deserve. Because in giving ourselves true love, self respect and compassion, we are able to give to others that much more powerfully.

In replenishing our cup first, in giving ourselves energy and strength, we have the strength to give our energy to others without burning out. We cannot possibly give to others when we are running on empty.

It does not make us an honorable or respected person to give if we cannot give to ourselves.

 In fact, it is interesting how others actually respect us more when we have the respect and kindness to take care of ourselves first.

The amazing thing is that giving become enjoyable, easy and actually quite energizing when we are strong within ourselves first. And when others ask us to do things for them, we feel grounded and know our limits. Because we start from a place of strength.

I realized the difference when I started building a compassionate relationship with myself. How much I am able to give to others when I start from a place of self-respect!

Learning to love ourselves first is not something to feel guilty about. When we start from a place of self-love, we are able to more powerfully inspire, contribute, engage and connect with the world and all of the abundance that it holds.

Blessings,

Julie