Life is Too Short to Not be Lived Fully

I am an amendment believer in not settling.There is a saying that goes something like this, "we regret the things we don't do more than the things we do." This is to say that there is more to gain in life than to lose.

But we are so afraid- of looking foolish, of failing, of judgement from others- that we procrastinate our success. We wait for other people to notice us instead of going ahead and shining our light.

As if being bold and unique is something to be ashamed of.

It is not and never was.

We are given a life, like a blank canvas, and it is our choice what we want to do with it. Just like when we paint, we choose what colors to paint with, how many and where we would like to place them on the canvas. In life, we choose what we do, how much we do it and who we want to do it with.

Much depends on our perspective. On how we choose to see our lives. And way the passing of time feels is completely related to our perspective.

When we live our lives fully, in awareness, in each moment and to our potential, we feel fulfilled and time doesn't just "fly by." It doesn't just pass us by because we are using it. We are the masters of our time.

There is no reason why we cannot live daringly, openly and wholeheartedly.

Blessings,

Julie

Listening to The Heart

Within each of us lies the voice of our heart. Sometimes it gets silenced when our head gets in the way, telling us to live our lives a certain way, a way that may just look good on paper.

But regardless of what happens, the voice of the heart is always present. When we are not influenced by the desires of others and allow our heart to speak, it always shows us exactly where we need to go, what we need to do, who we need to be to feel our most profound freedom and happiness. Rumi once said

"Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love. It will not lead you astray."

Here he is speaking about the voice of heart. And we may ask ourselves why do we not all follow this voice if it is so powerful and guiding? Well unfortunately I cannot offer one true answer to this question, but I can offer my perspective.

It is our fear of vulnerability, of expressing our truest selves that scares us. "It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, beautiful and talented?"
(Marianne Williamson)

Why hold back when our playing small does not serve the world? The answer is to not hold back. To shine our light.

When we accept ourselves fully and see past the self doubt, when we realize that we are deserving of what it is that we desire, then the heart can speak louder.

So let's listen to the voice that really matters.

Blessings,

Julie

Learning to Say No: The Value of Self Respect

I used to believe that putting myself first was something to feel guilty about. That it is wrong to make time and space for ourselves.

 This is not true.

Through experience, I realized that the person who calls someone selfish for needing to take care of themselves first is actually speaking for themselves and out of a lack of understanding and compassion. 

Of course there is a distinct difference with protecting one's own self respect and boundaries and being disrespectful and uncaring. Self respect and assertion comes from a conscious place of understanding and love, while rudeness  comes from a place of frustration and lack of self confidence, respect and love. Usually the way we treat others is a reflection of the way we feel about ourselves.

 Much of how we affect each other comes from the way in which we choose to communicate. If we assert our needs to others respectfully and they take it personally, then it is not our problem. These people are clearly not friends. True friends are understanding and understand that relationships are between two people who equally respect each others' needs.

One of the most important things I have learned about self respect is this:
The best thing we can do for others is to put ourselves first.

To become the strongest and most inspired versions of ourselves first, before we try to help others.  Why? Because then we have far more strength, inspiration and groundedness to share.  

We truly know how to give to others when we learn how to give to ourselves first. 

Knowing when to say no out of self respect requires awareness. Life is all about balance- making time for others, but without sacrificing our own needs. With awareness, we know ourselves better and we better know when it is the right time to say what.

Setting a limit on what is not working or bringing us down can  really mean yes.

Yes to what we do want and all the opportunities awaiting our decision to simply make the space and time for them.

Blessings,

Julie

Seeking Light in Darkness: The Gain in Pain

A year ago, I would have never guessed that I would be where I am now. This year has blessed me with life experience and a heap of chaos as well. While I am in a much better place now than I have ever been, I must acknowledge a certain fact. And this is that I would not be who I am now if it weren't for the pain and darkness of my past.

Going through a time of utter hopelessness made me question my life and what makes life worth living. And through this very experience, I started the journey of a truly meaningful life- one where I live as authentically, wholeheartedly and daringly as I possibly can. Not only did a learn about who I am and what makes me happy- I also saw the value of persistence. To pursue the path that we feel is right, even if we must take the first step alone. I realized that I would rather follow my heart and own inner compass, however unpredictable, than live a conventional life.

It comes down to a choice.

What we choose to do with our life experiences. We can embrace the pain and learn from it.

Often when we reach a point in life where we don't know what to do anymore, we change. We change because we ask ourselves questions and see that which is no longer serving us in our lives. And perhaps this very pain is what gave us the opportunity to change for the better and realize our passion. 

 It may be that through seeing what doesn't work, what we are not, that we find who we truly are.

  “In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.”

                                                               - Albert Camus 

 Blessings,

Julie 

Finding Inner Peace

I was talking to a friend yesterday and in our conversation expressed my belief that life is simple, but not always easy. Whatever is complicated is because we have made it complicated.

Life's cycles are unpredictable and filled with many ups and downs, but if we care to take a step back and look at our lives, all the pieces fit together perfectly. Life is whole. We are whole. Without the ups we wouldn't find a reason to live and without the downs we wouldn't appreciate the ups.

So how, then, can we find inner peace in this thing called life? It's messy and we can lose touch with ourselves and our hearts.

With awareness, we always come back within to realize that there is a stillness we can find. When we take a moment to honestly acknowledge our present and embrace all that lies within it, without judgement, we find peace.

And when we find that stillness and inner peace, we realize how powerful it is- to simply exist amidst the chaos of our everyday lives. 

"Peace. It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart."   (Unknown)

Blessings,

Julie

Discomfort and Inner Growth.

Remember when we were children and would complain of the growing pains in our knees? We were told that it was a good pain and would pass. Our body just needs to do it's work to become bigger and stronger.

Well, in keeping this same idea, inner growth works the same way. Emotionally, mentally and spiritually we grow in our lives. With every shift or change, we have the opportunity to learn more about ourselves. 

Certain things we learn with age, regardless of what we choose to do with our lives. But other times we have a choice. Are we going to be comfortable and do only that which we absolutely must do? Or do we look beyond with awareness? We can choose to embrace vulnerability and learn to be okay with the discomfort of the unfamiliar.

Our level of personal growth is a direct reflection of the amount of uncertainty we can handle. 

When we don't take risks, face our fears and embrace our adventurous self that thirsts to experience more, we simply do not fulfill our potential. Are we willing to be okay with not knowing everything? Whether we are taking off to travel the world, loving without expecting anything in return or simply allowing our true selves to show, these are risks that can be very uncomfortable. And are they worth it? Of course they are.

Of course it is worth it to be the truest expression of ourselves. To allow the world to see who we really are, without a mask. Yes, it is uncertain- who knows how people will react. But does it matter? Regardless of what we do, there will always be those who will judge and point a finger.

In being who we are, we are allowing ourselves to grow into our strongest selves . Not to mention the freedom of not having to think about pretending to be someone else.

Being who we are sounds so simple, but it can we tricky in this world where there are so many expectations around how we "should" be. The truth is that the unhappiness associated with not being who we are is far worse than the discomfort we sometimes experience in following our unique path and heart's desire.

So let's embrace individuality.

Blessings,

Julie

The Power in Simplicity.

Sometimes the most powerful and life-changing moments in our lives are the simple ones. They touch our hearts and we realize that we don't always need big and fancy things to live a rich and meaningful life.

We don't always need to achieve big things or have big plans to have a sense of fulfillment, aliveness and happiness with our lives.

Of course balance is the key. It is important to dream big and to create goals for ourselves so that we can realize our potential. But I have also found incredible value in living in the moment, and in savoring the simplicity it has to offer.

A warm hug,
A heartfelt conversation,
A genuine smile,
A good meal,
A beautiful day.

What are the simple moments that have impacted your life and touched your heart these days?

Too often we forget to see the beauty of what is right before us. Because we have grown accustomed to our surroundings. They become ordinary.

But really, it is in the seemingly ordinary moments that we can find extraordinary happiness. 

For the sake of this article, I will keep it short and sweet.

Here is a quote I love by Laura Ingalls Wilder (Famous children's author)

"I am beginning to learn that it is the sweet, simple things in life which are the real ones after all."

Blessings,

Julie