Being Resilient to Negativity

 

Just like when you workout and build the muscles in your body, you can also build the muscles of your mind. With daily practice, just like any other skill, you can train your mind to focus on the positive. As a result, this is what will happen:

* Positive thought focus = positive emotion = positive initiative/action = happiness! *

There it is, simple yet vital. If you practice consistently focusing on positive thoughts, you will have more control over your life. As a result, you will feel better and have more motivation to do the things that will bring you happiness. And so the cycle continues...

Now you may be asking yourself how this strong positive mindset is actually achieved. Well, in this article, I will show you just that, so read on!

First, commit to being positive. Decide that you are going to aim, every day, to be aware of the kind of thoughts you are thinking and what you are saying. Decide that you are going to try your best to focus on the positive thoughts. You are going to say positive things, encourage yourself and others and be someone who people want to be around. 

Second, avoid negative people. This sounds simple, but it can be quite challenging for many. Avoiding negative people requires us to be aware of who we are spending time with and setting limits on those who are bringing us down. This is a difficult thing to do, yet essential if you want to maintain a high positive vibe. However, once you realize that you do not have to be tied down to those negative people, you can make the shift. You can let go of negative people, giving space for the positive people to come into your life. This is the process, simplified: 

* Become aware of the people in your life → How is each one affecting you? Positively or negatively? → Set limits or completely avoid the negative people *

Third, focus on the positive aspects of your life. You might even want to take a pen and paper right now and write down ten things you are grateful for or ten things in your life that are bringing you happiness. And by focusing on the positive, the aim is to focus less on the negative. You may also want to limit the amount of time you spend watching or reading about the news. There is a lot of negative content there that we have no control over.

Fourth, look for positive people- people who focus on the positive things in their life. Yes, we all have problems, but it is our choice how much energy we invest into them. If there is a problem that you can take action upon, definitely do something about it. But if you cannot change it, don't waste your precious energy! So find people who are positive and inspired and don't waste time gossiping because this is not only negative, but often hurtful and useless. 

And finally, read or watch inspirational content. This includes books, magazines, movies, videos, blogs and websites. A really great blog that I enjoy reading often is: http://www.positivityblog.com/
This is a great source of wisdom and positivity. Henrik, the author, does an amazing job at inspiring those of us who aim to live inspired and happy lives.

Build Your Strength to Inspire it in Others

 Self care is vital. Investing in your own well-being allows you to be your most effective, powerful and strongest self. Think about it for a moment: you make yourself feel really good so that you can contribute your best into what you do and to the lives of others. It's OK to put yourself first. When you make your own happiness a priority, your impact on the happiness of others will be that much stronger. You are ready and able to share what you now know to be true to you. You are a practitioner of what you preach. You are genuine and your energy is valuable and lasting. So make yourself feel really good- do what it takes to fill your cup and nurture your own happiness. Because in that, you are truly powerful. In this article, I will show you why investing in yourself is the best thing you can do.

1 It Feels Good!

Let's face it, when you feel good, life is enjoyable and fulfilling. Do the things that make you feel good, do them often and your life experience is bound to be a happy and inspired one. What you do has meaning and purpose.

For example, if you are taking care of yourself by sleeping well, eating hearty meals, exercising regularly, meditating, taking baths, spending time in nature and with positive friends and doing whatever makes you feel good, everything else brings you joy. You find enjoyment in work and with every situation that you encounter.

2 You are Strong

Addressing your own needs gives you a strong base. You are ready for whatever comes your way. Negative situations don't affect you as they would have otherwise. You are resilient.  You work effectively and efficiently with focus and commitment. You are open to learn and grow, gaining the most of your life experience. You have sorted yourself and given attention to personal needs. Now there is less to worry about and you have space: to be in the moment and find peace within it.

3 You Inspire Others
  
What makes you feel good? By doing these things, you are independent- your happiness is not dependent on other people. And this is powerful because it means that whatever is given to you will only add to the abundance that you have created for yourself. People will respect you and you will be a leader. You will be able to help others and inspire them to create happiness because you are living your word- this means taking action upon your beliefs and values. In giving yourself strength first, you can truly be strong for others and connect with them on a profound level.

The Power in Fear

What are your biggest fears? Being alone? Facing the unknown? Are you scared of change? Connecting with people? We all have fears but what I say is "so what?" So what if we have fears? Fear does not have to stop you from taking risks, following your dreams and experiencing all that life has to offer. 

Comfort and security is important and routine offers a great supportive structure to our lives, but it's when we rely on it all the time that we can lose sight of what else is out there. We can get stuck in the same routine, doing the same things, in the same places and with the same people. We like knowing what to expect because we can plan and ensure safety for ourselves. Routine brings a sense of satisfaction and we can confidently say that "everything is good enough". But what is good enough? I say there is never a "good enough"! Good enough doesn't exist because there is always more to discover, more places to see and more inspiring individuals to meet.

This is the way I like to think of it: life is an adventure and we are explorers!
Life is meant to be fun, exciting and sometimes challenging. And pushing through the challenges will lead you to more excitement and adventure.


We fear facing the unknown but in order to discover new things and unique experiences we must push through discomfort and fear. Because trust me, on the other side is power beyond measure- and by this I mean inner power, the power to feel happiness in every cell of your body and the power to love. Here is why facing fear is one of the best things you can do:

1 You Realize that Fear Itself is Never the Issue

Fear is a sensation. And yes, it can be thought about and certainly felt in the body. But this is not a reason why you shouldn't take action and do what you want to do in life. So notice the fear, but also take action. Trust me, it is possible to multitask here!

2 You Gain Confidence

Doing the things you are afraid of and putting yourself in new environments is uncomfortable at first, but just like anything else, you get used to it. And the fear goes away! A good example is public speaking. At first the speaker is trembling and unsure but with time he/she gains confidence. So with each new experience comes fear, but also confidence because you realize that you can handle it. And then you might say to yourself, "If I can handle this, than I can handle anything!" And this is really, really good.

3 You Enrich your Life Experience

Not being afraid of facing fear (How ironic!) and doing the things that you want to do, despite fear will bring unique, beautiful, amazing and yes, also challenging experiences. And through the challenges you will learn more and gain confidence in your ability to deal with them. And then you will go out and do more! And this is all worth it because now you have excitement and adventure. Through facing my fear, I have met incredible people, been in beautiful places and experienced things that I had previously thought to be impossible.

So face the fear and do what you really want.

The 3 Miracles of Struggle

 

Struggling is not fun. Going through a hard time is both tiring and frustrating. Trust me, I know because I have been there myself. During the times that we are faced with defeat and impossible challenges, it is hard to see the light. It is hard to see the positive and we think we are going off course. But I am here to tell you that it is sometimes through our darkest times that we realize our greatness. And this is why:

1 We Learn and Grow

When we are faced with challenges, we often have to find other ways to deal with them because our old ways aren't working anymore. So we search for new things, things that inspire us, things that make us feel fulfilled and things that bring meaning into our lives. We are pushed to find the things that bring happiness because the things we are doing are not working. We have to look deep into ourselves to see what we really need. And through all this, we find who we really are.

2 We Realize our Strength

Sometimes we don't realize how strong we actually are until faced with hardship. In the darkest time of my life, I had no idea how I would get through it. I still don't know where my strength came from, but it came. And it always does. When we are faced with the unknown, things that we have never dealt with, life seems impossible. But I am here to tell you that there is always a way. Always.

3 We Discover New Things

We struggle because the things that were working in our lives are not working anymore. Either it is a job that is not bringing pleasure or the people in your life are bringing you down- you name it. My point is that struggle is painful but it helps us make changes and see differently.

When we struggle, we are forced to notice those things that are not working or making us happy. And the benefit of this experience is that it inspires change. We find new ways. And with an open heart and mind, we discover things that we never even knew existed. An openness to change means meeting inspiring people, seeing beautiful places and ultimately living through new experiences that will show you how rich this world is with more than you can even imagine.

THE POWER OF TAKING ACTION

 

Developing the habit of taking consistent action may not be the easiest thing to start but it certainly is worth it. Trust me when I say this because I have been there myself- feeling helpless and inadequate, waiting for people and circumstances to come to me so I could feel real and purposeful. But the truth is that the power to tap into a purposeful existence is within you- yes, you have all the tools you need to be ultimately productive and successful in everyday projects and tasks as well as with long-term goals. We have so much precious time on this lovely earth- why not do incredible things with it? Why not challenge ourselves to DO great things. Because by doing this, you will realize how much incredible potential you have. You will realize that you have the power to achieve more than you think. Now I am not saying that you should jam pack your daily schedules and leave no room to rest. A healthy balance is what we are aiming for here. My point is this: taking consistent action is meant to make you feel good! When you achieve your daily goals and gain confidence by doing this, resting and relaxing after will feel way better!

HOW TO INSTILL THE ACTION HABIT:

1 Make a Schedule

Buy a lovely planner and plan your week. Plan to do things that make you feel good and do these things regularly. Consistency is key in order to gain the benefits of a specific activity. For example, if you plan a workout 3-4 times a week, you will feel much better than if you had one workout in a week. Include the activities that make you feel productive such as your job and any classes/courses that you attend. What are your goals? Goals don't just get achieved, you have to work towards them. Taking action every day towards your goals will help you do great things.

2 Stop Thinking, Just Do

We all have great minds when it comes to rationalizing or giving reasons for why we are not able to get something done. The conditions will never be perfect so waiting for the "perfect" conditions or "perfect" inspiration may keep you waiting for years. You don't want that because you can get things done NOW! We all have problems and obstacles but what we don't realize sometimes is that these obstacles aren't meant to make us powerless- they are meant to challenge us so that we can become more powerful. So do more and think less. And the important thing is that you are getting things done, they don't have to be done perfectly to gain the benefits. 

3 Face Fear

What are your goals? Are you scared of putting yourself out there to achieve them because you might fail? Well first off, you may actually succeed! When we haven't tried something yet and we don't know what to expect, we often think about how things could go wrong. But in doing this, we are totally neglecting the fact that the probability of success in achieving our goals is just as high. And by the way, in my opinion, there is no such thing as failure because our "so called" failures shape us into our strongest and most inspiring selves.

4 Trust Yourself

Know what you want and take consistent action in achieving your goals. There will be people who think they know what is good for you but the truth is that you know yourself the best and when you feel like you need to do something for yourself, you are right! The people who are trying to control your life probably lack control in their own. So own it, be confident in your decisions and have faith in your strengths and amazing abilities!

5 Know When to Rest

Get to know yourself. How much can you handle and when is it time to let go and sink into a warm bath with candles and tea? Getting things done feels good and will give you a sense of accomplishment, but you don't want to use too much energy at one time. Pace yourself, be aware and notice when you need to take breaks, let go and replenish your stores.

What is Mindfulness?

Mindfulness is a very powerful way of living. Being mindful has helped me to connect with my inner self and find peace. Now you are probably wondering, what is mindfulness? Well, it is being aware of the present moment. I know, it sounds simple but actually doing it can be challenging, especially in the world we live in today. There's technology and a many other things that can consume our lives and take away from our experience of the present moment.

We can worry about the future or regret the past, but the most real a sensory experience can be is in the present moment, now. The present is a good time- we can gain control of our lives within it and become aware of the way we are now. When there is an awareness of our present being, we become more in tune with our true needs and desires. Through this, we can further become aware of the changes we need to make for the future. Becoming mindful of the present allows for better decision-making.

Why? Because when we are aware of our needs in the moment, then we have the power to change the future in a way that is truly beneficial to our well-being and happiness.

Here are a few ways to bring you closer to the present moment:

1 Be Present to Physical Sensations

Become aware of the sensations in your body at this time. Notice them, without judgement. Are your hands cold? Do you feel comfortable? Is your breathing deep? Are your muscles relaxed?

2 Be Present to What you are Doing

Notice the things you are doing in this moment. What are you engaged in? You may notice things that you have never before. As you are doing the things that you do, get in tune with your senses. How does that soup smell? How does the music sound? The trees and water, how are they?

3 Be Present in Relationships

When we are in a conversation with someone, such as a friend, it is easy to get sidetracked and think about other things. Or think about what we want to say. You might find though, that truly listening to someone when they speak is a rewarding practice. You learn more about the other person and then what you say to them after they speak will not only make more sense, but will deepen the meaning of the conversation. I have found that through really being with someone and listening to them, I am able to contribute more and develop a stronger connection with them.

By being aware of the present moment, we are able to experience something for what it is. We are able to notice the simple, yet profoundly beautiful things in life that we otherwise might not notice if we were caught up in a busy schedule, thinking about what's next. Being mindful brings the mind and body together in a peaceful state. I have found that experiencing in the moment has allowed me to discover what really feels good and what doesn't. It has given me perspective and allowed me to make wise choices for the future.

How To Stay True to Yourself

I think that following your heart and listening to your guiding intuition is the most important thing you can do. Making choices that are for my well-being and happiness has led me to great opportunities and people. It is not always an easy process because following your heart is your journey and nobody else can tell you what feels good. But I can assure you, the energy spent in staying true to your values is well spent and completely worth it. People who share your vision will come into your life to inspire and support you. There are 5 powerful points that I will cover in this article so read on and stay inspired!

Sometimes doing what you feel is right is scary because it isn't what most people seem to be doing. But remember, this is your life and you have the power to create whatever it is that you want. And through making the choices that benefit your happiness, you will find incredible people. So face the fear and realize that on the other side of it is greatness and beauty beyond measure.

1 Learn to Say No

I know this is very hard for some people, but learning to say no is so important. It is not your job to take on the world, do everything and please everyone. Your focus is to do what you can and the things that bring you happiness. When you take the time to set your own limits, people will actually respect you more. And in the long run, you will accomplish more. You will feel more energetic, focused and productive.

2 Meditate 

Take some time (even 5 minutes) each day to relax and really be with yourself. Meditation can take many different forms- doing what is right for you is the best. Meditation can be as simple as sitting or laying down on the ground and paying attention to the breath. Be aware of the sensations in your body and the thoughts that arise in your mind, without judgement. I like meditating in the evening with a few candles after taking a warm bath!

3 Define Your Values and Stick to Them

What do you  believe in? What makes you feel happy? Sit down and take a few minutes to write down your values. What is important to you? The more you experience in life, the more opportunity you have to define your own belief system. Know what your values are and stick to them!

4 Surround Yourself with Like Minds

Be open to connecting with people who share your vision of life. If your friends are negative and critical, stop spending time with them and wasting your precious energy. Search for people who share the same passions that you do. Aim to be with positive and inspiring people for they will show you the world.

5 Ask for Help

If a challenging situation arises, realize that asking for help might be the simplest and most rewarding things you can do. Asking for help is actually a sign of strength and courage. Sometimes all it takes is a 20 minute conversation with someone to gain perspective, feel supported and become inspired.
 

The Beauty of Simplicity

At the end of the day, what really matters are the simple things. The things that we are often not aware of and take for granted. It is the air we breathe, the water we drink, the food we eat and the bed we sleep in that make our lives possible. These are basic, yet vital.  After a long and hectic day of work or school, sometimes all we really need is a good meal and a warm conversation with a friend. In the past few months especially, I found there to be an incredible beauty and greatness in the simple things in life. I realized that the life I want and the life that will bring me fulfillment and happiness is actually quite simple. 

Material things are great in moderation but I find that they often replace the true needs of many people who are spending money on an excessive amount of stuff. 

The truth is that more stuff does not equal more happiness.

Investing in products and services that benefit our well-being and livelihood is good but when we let a materialistic life consume us, our true needs of happiness become drowned.

So really become aware of the simple things in your life that make you feel good. For example:

- A vicious and beautiful thunderstorm

- A warm hug 

- Encouragement from someone who cares

- A fresh bed with clean sheets

- A warm shower

- A good laugh!

- A good run

- A great dinner at home or in a restaurant

- Sharing a smile with a stranger

- Interesting movies on the couch with popcorn

- A good book

- Music that touches your heart

- A lush forest of trees

And much more..

Take a minute to reflect on your life and what you really need. You may realize that it's not as complicated as many make it out to be. What makes you feel fulfilled and at peace at the end of the day? Do you need all the stuff that you have? What of all your things are you using regularly to benefit your well-being? What is just taking up space?

MAKE THE SHIFT, CHANGE YOUR LIFE: STEP 8

 

Creating an Inspiring Support System

Do you have role models? Do you have a strong support system of people who allow you to be your best and happiest self? It is vital that you surround yourself with positive, inspiring and motivated people. Do not settle for or believe that you deserve to be surrounded by people who are negative, critical, closed-minded and pessimistic. If you are reading this final, yet unbelievably crucial step, then you are clearly interested in pursuing a life of meaning, purpose and true happiness. So I am here to tell you that you deserve it all and you deserve to be around people who make you feel good.

Following your heart is fulfilling but not always easy because sometimes it is a lonely process. Sometimes you may make a choice that feels right but there is nobody there to tell you that you are on the right path. That is why you must trust your heart and intuition.  And trust me, as you continue to make these important decisions, people will come into your life. In the very beginning of my happiness journey, I had to make a choice to change my environment. My first choice happened when I decided to stop doing what didn't feel good. I spent three winter months in 2010 in darkness, until I made another big decision. I left a school that couldn't give me what I needed to feel real and happy. Of course, I was also leaving behind the people I knew. I decided that I would search for those people who inspired me and believed in the kind of happiness I knew was possible but hadn't truly felt yet.

So I am here to tell you that following your heart and taking action based on your intuition will lead to great things. Do what you feel is right, and be open to finding and connecting with people who see you for who you really are. People who are real and honest. 

We really are a product of our environment. Don't feel good in an environment? Change it. Whether it is your school, circle of friends and family, workspace or bedroom, if it doesn't make you feel good, change it. As you make choices for your own happiness, the people you need will come into your life. Be open to connecting with these individuals and they will show you the world.

I have been truly blessed to be surrounded by people who continuously inspire me to be my happiest self. Thank you to all of those people.

Main Points to Grasp:

• Surround yourself with positive, real people and believe you deserve people like this in your life!
• Trust your heart and take action based on intuition
• Change your environment if it isn't  making you feel good 
• When you make choices for happiness, the right people will come into your life
• Be open to finding and connecting with inspiring people